John Lennon Was Right, or How I Got Into The Baseball Hall of Fame

"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans" sang John Lennon in his song "Beautiful Boy". I could not agree more.

Like all musicians, I'm susceptible to all the usual musician's daydreams. Sold out shows, hit songs, hit albums, Grammy awards, world-wide tours, etc. These sorts of daydreams usually strike when you are younger, when the whole world of possibilities is in front of you. You think "if I do this and this and this, then that will happen", but it usually doesn't. The so-called "experts" tell you to set goals and plan in order to steer your career in the direction you intend it to go.

The reality is practically all of it is beyond your control. My "day job" is in TV sports broadcasting, and one day back in the '90s I had a gig coming up at a local club. A couple nights before the show I was working on the Yankees broadcast of a Twins/Yankees game, and I put a poster advertising my gig up near the production truck. The Yankees TV producer saw the poster, and asked if I could write a song for the show about how host Al Trautwig was off and Mike Crispino was sitting in for him. I had to go home to get my guitar, and I wrote the song as I drove. When I got back we taped the song for the open of the pregame show. I guess it went well, because I did two more songs for them the next time the Yankees were in town. When I started working Twins home shows, the producers said I should do a song for their show, but there was nothing seriously proposed and I didn't have any ideas anyway.

In 2002 Twins TV analyst Bert Blyleven began circling people with the telestrator, which is a device which is used as a "drawing board" so to speak. John Madden first started using it on NFL broadcasts to illustrate the development of a football play. Bert started circling fans at the ballpark, and a craze was born. Soon people started bringing all sorts of "Circle Me Bert" signs to the games. So I wrote a song called "Circle Me Bert" and brought it to the Twins TV producers. They liked it, and we shot a video for the song in front of the Metrodome. The video was of a fictional band (think Spinal Tap or The Rutles), which included me, Fox Sports North sideline reporter Clay Matvick, and Bert Blyleven in a wig playing tambourine. The video aired on the Twins pregame show. The Twins saw it, liked the song, and decided to give away CDs of "Circle Me Bert" to the first 10,000 fans in attendance at a Twins game. I got a little $ for that, and I figured that was pretty much the beginning and end of "Circle Me Bert" for me.

Fast forward to 2011. Bert Blyleven is inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. A month or so later, I got an email from the Hall asking for a copy of "Circle Me Bert" for their library. This was a big surprise, certainly nothing I envisioned or planned, and, frankly, kind of cool. I just spoke to Tim Wiles at the Hall today, and he told me that "Circle Me Bert" will be there as long as the Baseball Hall of Fame exists. And I suppose hundreds of years from now, someone may take a listen to it and wonder "who the hell is this?" So if it's 2111 and you are reading this, that's the story.

Life is definitely what happens when you're making other plans.

Twins Song: The Report

It's been quite nearly a month since I was hired to write and perform a song for the Minnesota Twins. If you're wondering what that is all about, you can read my last post and catch up. I'll wait.

OK, now that you're up to speed I'll let you know how the whole thing went. The party for the team was thrown at the Chambers Hotel in Minneapolis the evening of Sunday September 19. I got there around 5, but it was way too early as the guests were not to arrive till around 6:30. So I called my buddy Joe, who happened to be nearby at a bar, and stopped by the bar and had a couple of beers. This may or may not have been a good idea.

So after a couple beers it was getting close to 6:30 and I headed back to the Chambers. The first person I ran into was Jim Thome, in the Men's Room no less. "Hey, Jim Thome!" I said, cleverly enough. An awesome homerun hitter--he's number 8 on the MLB all time home run list. Number 5, if you don't count the steroid users, which I don't. In other words, he's a big deal. As we were leaving the men's room I noticed he had a bit of a hitch in his gait, so with that and the fact that he's 40 years old I felt a little twinge of guilt that in the first verse of my song I was making fun of the way he runs.

My instructions were that the song had to be funny, and I think it's kind of funny the way he runs "like a Rock'em Sock'em Robot."

Anyway party guests began trickling in. Members of the team, coaches, front office people, big shots from FSN, FSN talent, and of course the Pohlad family.

The plan was that I would perform the song right before dessert. They were serving a four or five course meal, so I had lots of time to get uncomfortable. Basically I was hanging around--in the lobby, in the courtyard, here and there--just waiting. As I was wandering about I ran into Twins play-by-play announcer Dick Bremer, who was having a conversation with Twins infielder Nick Punto and his (Nick's) wife. Dick introduced me to the Puntos, and explained that I was there to perform a song about the team. I mentioned to Nick that he is in the song, and he got all serious and said "What do you MEAN, I'm in the song?" And Mrs. Punto asked "Am I going to have to throw a shoe at you?" And so now I had that to think about.

Later while wandering about I ran into the Twins CEO Jim Pohlad. Mr. Pohlad explained that his niece, Sarah, has a lovely singing voice and thought I should ask her to join me in singing Happy Birthday to Twins players Danny Valencia and Scott Baker. So Jim took me over to Sarah's table where she was sitting with her husband Joe. (This is where I realized that there are more Pohlads than I even knew. I had seen Joe in the pressbox many times and always thought he was an intern. He's young.) Anyway Jim Pohlad introduced me to Sarah and Joe, and I sat down. I mentioned that her uncle had said she was a very good singer, and would she care to join me later in singing Happy Birthday? Well she was absolutely not interested, and I said of course that's fine, I understand. And Jim Pohlad, who was standing right there, said "No you don't. Keep trying," which I was not comfortable doing, but I made a half-hearted attempt anyway. Joe was not amused with my second attempt and signaled that we were through by saying "Nice talking to you Jim," and turning away from me. Wellll, THAT was kind of awkward.

Later I ran into Twins President Dave St. Peter, who had a big smile on his face and asked "how did that go?" Clearly Dave had witnessed the exchange and knew quite well how it went.

Jim Pohlad had said that I should have some food, which I hadn't done up to that point because seeing as that I was the hired help I didn't think I was invited to sit down and eat with all the guests. But by then I was not too hungry, and though it was a very gracious offer I declined and continued to wait to perform.

Ocassionally while I was waiting I went "backstage", behind a little partition in the dining room, to go over the song. I have to confess that since I had just wrote it I was not entirely comfortable with the song. I was, in a sense, learning it myself even though I had written it. So after going over the song again, I came out from behind the partition and ran into William Pohlad, who I regard as the coolest Pohlad.
He said to me "You're that guy!"
And I said, "Yes I am."
He put out his hand and said "Bill Pohlad. They're looking for you."
And so it was showtime.

I was glad it was Danny and Scott's birthday, because at least that gave me an opening song I was familiar with. I noticed Jim Thome out there, and I made a little speech about running into Jim, thinking "wow, that's Jim Thome!", and then apologizing for the first verse. And Nick Punto was right up front, but I didn't notice his wife anywhere. So without further ado I launched into the song. And while I don't remember much about the performance, I can tell you that the Jim Thome verse got a big laugh, as did the verse about Ron Gardenhire. Other than that, it's a blank. I've performed lots of shows at lots of places and I don't get nervous, but I have to say that this night as soon as I started singing my mouth went as dry as a desert. Lips sticking to teeth, cheeks sticking to gums--I had to enunciate with as much precision as I could muster to make sure the song was intelligible. That may have been a good thing. Why the nerves? Maybe it was due to singing a song I wasn't yet comfortable with that is supposed to be funny in front of the people I was singing about? Maybe I was looking for a flying shoe?

But I guess it all went well, at least that's what people have told me. Though Twins bullpen coach Ron Stelmaszek said I was a bit rough on Thome.

Sick Again

I'm canceling the second show in a row, due to whatever bug I have. I hate canceling shows. But the fact is I'm hoarse and raspy and prone to coughing fits when I take a deep breath. And you have to take deep breaths to sing, and hoarse and raspy is not my singing style. If it were, I'd be there tonight.

What I really hate is that this is the second cancelation in a row. The last being two weeks ago, when I had most of the same symptoms plus a fever. I know they say "the show must go on", but who the hell are "they" anyway? And why do they want me to perform when I'm sick?

Halloween Gig

I played a Halloween show at the Riverview last night. In the spirit of the holiday I wore zombie make-up. I wanted to wear a costume that allowed me to sing and play, so a mask or anything that interfered with my guitar playing was out. So I got some liquid latex, nose putty, and some make-up and created my zombie look. It turned out pretty good, and it was easy to perform. And I got used to the tightness of the latex on my face after a while.

The gig itself was pretty good--started slow but the place filled up in time. It was a solo gig--I never got an answer from Conor about playing, and I didn't even bother asking Dennis because I knew he'd be out trick-or-treating with Ruby. I like the freedom of playing a solo gig--I can do whatever I feel like doing. I had some fun with the looping pedal, layering sounds, starting with a bass line using the octave pedal, add an acoustic guitar, then a little shaker, then switch to the strat for another part, then play a little harmonica solo on top of that.

And I debuted a new "tool"--I bought a Shadow stombbox--which is a small wooden box with a pickup in it that you play with your foot. You plug it right into the PA, and it adds a kick drum effect to your sound. I ran it through a gated reverb on some songs--sounded pretty cool. It was a little fatiguing to play though. You always had to be in one place tapping it with your foot. I found it better to turn it around and hit it with my heal, which feels more natural for me. "Wow, that's really boring, Jim" I hear you saying.

But the gig was fun--Kelly kept bringing me beers before I finished the one I was on, so I had two going most of the night. Nothing wrong with that.

By the way, wearing liquid latex, nose putty, and make-up for seven hours is not that great of an idea. This morning my face is all red--looks and feels just like a sunburn.

Private Party

OK, I've been fairly inactive this summer. I'll admit it. The usual summer parks gigs did not materialize, for some reason. I can't help but think that it might be because I'm friends with the booker's ex-boyfriend, but would she really be that way? Nah--I don't think so. But none the less, I sent in my dates available (at her request) and nothing became of it. Oh well. It's not like those gigs pay much, if anything. It was more of an exposure opportunity.

Tomorrow I have a private party to play. I have been playing benefits for Wishes And More the past few years, and someone who saw me at one of those shows contacted me to play their party. So off I go. My first thought was to get Dennis to play sax with me, but he's not available. And I thought about getting Connor to play percussion, but I'm guessing he's booked with his other band. And this would be VERY short notice. So I'll play the show solo, which is what they are expecting anyway.

Four hours solo! Haven't done that in a long time. Not since college anyway.

To Twitter or not to Twitter, that is the question...

Well, it's the latest fad. People are twittering their every action, or inaction as the case may be. And it is highly recommended to musicians by The People Who Know, as a way of connecting with the public. But I can't help but wonder "who the hell cares?" Are there really people who follow this stuff?

Lake Harriet Bandshell 6/24/08

Well it was a good show I think. I had a few friends show up, Jeff Pedersen (who took some great photos), John Warner and his wife Patty, Sue Strand and my wife Monica. Some members of the mailing list were there as well. I know this because one person filled out a mailing list request card, requesting to be removed from the list! He said he could follow my shows on my website. That was a first, I must say. But no problem, he's off. I have often wondered about the people I send postcards to, whether or not they read the cards and come to the shows. Every now and then someone will stop by the stage after a show and tell me they are on the mailing list, so that's nice to know. But I'm sure there are lots of people who don't make the shows. Presumably they filled out a card at a show, wanting to be on the mailing list. A few did tonight as well.

But I digress. It was a good sized crowd, enjoying a fine summer evening. I really couldn't have gotten better weather. Bruce and Dennis did a fantastic job, as always.

But there's one thing I'm going to start doing differently. I think I'm going to bag the drum tracks coming from the looping pedal. The justification always was that it is me playing the drums on those loops--they are drum tracks from the recording sessions for the songs. And today plenty of bands use loops onstage. And, lacking a drummer, I thought it lent a good rendition of the recorded version of the songs. But there's just too much chance for error, and no chance at all to stretch out and improvise. Plus, there's a "old skool" streak in me that says it's just a little too close to bogus.

I should have known; last night when Bruce and I were rehearsing I often thought the straight no-loops versions we were practicing sounded pretty good. I should've gone with my instincts. Oh well, you experiment and you learn. No big deal.

Next show--July 7 at Father Hennepin Bluff Park in Minneapolis.